alright

it is alright to be sore some mornings, to want to lie there forever,
to look at the sun and say, "Pfft," to need to rest, to sleep, to be still.

it is alright to not want children just now, to be patient, even as the clock ticks, to let the women around you love their babies, to sniff your nephew's neck and fall in love with him, it is alright to love children and not want to have them just now, to wait, to think even about the possibility of not having them, to contemplate that, or to think about adopting, or not, to think about other ways in which you might have children in your life, but not have children, maybe, possibly, to not know about any of that just yet.

it is alright to remember that your dogs are dogs, not people, and that if you are not always nice to them, meaning not playing with them all the time, or making sure they get exactly the kind of exercise to wipe them out, if they are restless and you get irritated, close your office door to bar their entry, if you move them off the couch when you want to watch television, if you tell them to stop barking and raise your voice when they don't, if you get tired at the dog hair threading its way into all of your black clothes, if you want to have a vacation without them, if some days they are getting just the basics but not anything extra, it is alright.

it is alright to not be able to be everywhere at once, to disappoint a friend, to miss a commitment you really believed you could make, to let things go when it's impossible to keep them together, to make a mistake, to step on toes, to have to apologize, to be wrong, to be sorry, to be unable to quite make it up.

it is alright to be angry, to fume and agitate and disassemble.

it is alright to want more.

it is alright to do the work, to stumble, to fall, to pick yourself up again, to scrub your knees of gravel, to mend, to heal, to soften, to want, to ache, to look, to join, to love.

it is alright to rise up, to angle toward the light, to have the best possible intentions. It is alright to wait until you are ready, to pace yourself, to take better care, to keep trying, to take as much time as it takes, to be careful, to want to be good.

it is alright.