January 26, 2021

narrative

You can change the entire mood with lighting. Or a haircut. If you put the spaghetti
in a bowl. If you watch a reality TV show instead of a documentary. If you set the table. 
If you don’t. You can unsubscribe from that newsletter you never read. You can write 
a letter, and by letter I mean stationery and a stamp and a real envelope you seal shut 
with your own tongue. You can talk to your kittens as if they were the children 
you never had. You can discover yourself tearful at this sudden, voluminous love. 
You can build an entire narrative out of what you don’t have. You can stare your absences
in the eye. You can call them loss or grief or, better yet, in Portuguese, saudade, which
explains it better. You can change the entire mood by sliding your mouth around those
syllables and softening your teeth, and feeling the lump as you swallow.

Note: This piece is an excerpt of a longer one I wrote in one of my Zoom writing classes this month. The first line comes from an advertisement for a lighting company.